So it's three in the morning and I can't get to sleep on my new comfy bed because I have too much going on in my mind. Struggles. Like severe struggles.
But isn't that what life is about, at least for the majority of people?
Sorry for the existential crisis bomb that I just blew up, but I have to imagine that I am not the only one who feels like they just got covered in pig's blood at the prom and my telekinesis wont kick in. DAMN YOU STEPHEN KING!
It is just that, I finally got this awesome internship in the field that I want to work in, but I still don't feel 100%. I don't want to confuse this feeling with contempt against the internship because I actually love it. I'm learning so much about commercial theatre and I really love everyone that works in the office. I just feel lost still.
The first big issue, and I mean BIG, is this whole student loan business. Unrelated? Not by a long shot.
You see I went to Emerson College. I had a fantastic time, learned a lot, met some life longs friends and contacts, and would not change a thing about my experience. Well....except for the fact that I have over 80,000 dollars in loans. You see, America sucks and doesn't really help out their citizens with educational costs like our European friends do. For christ's sake, even Canada does a better job at it. For the amount of money I owe, I can't even begin to pay it back because the economy blows severe balls....gross I know....and I can just get myself by. Now this is not a woe is me party by any means because I chose to take out those loans and go to school. But I've discovered this fundamental problem with how this whole "American" system works.
As Americans, we are expected to go to college. Without the degrees, we are told that we wont amount to anything more than a Walmart manager - and in all fairness they make more money than I do. Yet here I am, degree in closet, and I can't seem to make ends meat. Beyond the fact that I can't really even consider going back to school because my credit is so bad that I couldn't even get more loans, I'm surrounded my people who DIDN'T get degrees and are doing more than fine. In fact, these people seem more grounded and on track than I have felt in years.
I look at these people, and I envy their freedom from having to worry about the fact that, at some point, I need to make enough money to pay this massive debt off.
That's when the day dreams start happening. Me thinking about what I would do if I won the lottery, or became uber famous and could just pay off the debt. This is what my life has centered around. Not what kind of art I want to make or what story I want to tell. I've become apart of the all-american "get rich quick" mentality because so many of us really need it.
We have created a society that does not support those that need the help. We put money into oil wars that we created, into other countries that we've destroyed, and into the hands of the wealthy and well-off.
So then I think about Snooki. She, like so many Americans, realized that the only way to work with the system was to find a way onto television. She happened to be interesting enough that made it worthwhile for MTV to pay her to be a train wreck. So while she's making 10,000 an episode for having sex and saying funny things while she's drunk, I'm making 15,000 a YEAR trying to be a real person.
I would love to be on television, but to be apart of a creative show that really effected people. The fact of the matter is, watching these shit-shows is entertaining and we all buy into it. I feel like what I'm getting at is, I probably just have to find a niche in reality tv in order to pay back the money for an education that I might have needed but who's the judge on that anyway?
At the end of the day, I don't want to do that. I don't want to talk about eating pickles and having a puff on my hair to create an image for myself so that my 15 minutes lasts an extra 5. But I do want to be free from this restraint.
I have this tattoo that reads, "Live once, with no regrets". I try everyday to do that, but so much works against that. Doubt is a serious ailment, and it undervalues the lessons that we learn.
I was once told to have patience and perspective when trying to achieve your goals. I think I need a new perspective, a new outlook, to try and figure out where the light is coming from at the end of my tunnel. I can be patient. I just need some direction. Who knows, maybe I should just read "The Secret" or some other philosophy based following.
What I do know is that I have a lot to be thankful for, in my friends and my drive and the fact that I have a job and a home. First world problems are tougher than I imagined though.
At least I have my little blog.
LOVE AND STRUGGS
B DANN
ps- An apology to Snooki. I think your entertainment value is tremendous. Tremendous in the way that makes me want to kill myself because you're making so much money, but tremendous non-the-less. Keep fist-pumping the night away.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
Dear Plaid on Plaid - or - Why Old People Get to Wear Whatever
I am a plaid expert. Ask anyone. I know how to pair it and integrate it into almost every part of my life. This is both physically and metaphorically speaking. For goodness' sakes I have more plaid shirts than I don't. If I liked the lady bits I would be prime real estate for lesbian moving companies.
Because I am an expert, I have the right to add the plaid feature to different parts of my life. Such examples include plaid underwear, bed sheets, and disposition....
I also have the foreknowledge to see when the commoners are abusing their right to wear plaid. This happens when an individual, usually also wearing "mandals" or off-putting crocs pairs his plaid shirt with plaid shorts.
It is almost too hard to continue...that's what she said. Forgive me if it seems odd that I keep making those jokes, but I can't pass up a good "that's what she said" in life or in writing so you'll just have to deal with it.
I have variety in my plaid, usually pertaining around a base color. Plaid works well in that it provides accents to an otherwise boring button up shirt. Yet I find that these offenders often find the worst plaids possible. They find the kind of plaid that has no distinct direction, no base color, and seems to have too many ideas going on at the same time. It's like Rihanna.
It would actually be OK if they just kept it to the shirt or the shorts and paired it with something a little more....I don't know, fashion forward? What they do instead is a disgusting act of mutiny that I don't think anyone should stand for. They pair their ugly shirt with a pair of shorts that are just close enough to the same pattern to ALMOST be a plaid short suit....but they aren't quite there.
I saw several of these offenders in one week and thought I was going to loose my eye-sight when something all together odd happened. I saw an elderly man not only wearing plaid with plaid, but he had giant spectacles and a bow-tie to boot! The only thing I could think about him was, "HOW CUTE IS THAT LITTLE OLD MAN?"
That's when it all made sense. Old people get to wear whatever they want. Well. Old people and Lady Gaga.
You see, like the Lady Gaga, old people can strut around in literally their naked birth suit and people will only applaud their decision. I've seen men wear pants up to their chins, women wear giant purple moo moos with ice cream stains from three weeks ago, and a couple wearing matching gold lamay track outfits. I have never thought to myself, "OOF! What is that old person wearing?". I only find it endearing when I see a 70 year old grandmother walking down the street with bright yellow dyed hair.
Why they have this ability, I'm not sure. But I'll tell you one thing.
I'm jealous.
LOVES AND STRUGGS
B DANN
Because I am an expert, I have the right to add the plaid feature to different parts of my life. Such examples include plaid underwear, bed sheets, and disposition....
I also have the foreknowledge to see when the commoners are abusing their right to wear plaid. This happens when an individual, usually also wearing "mandals" or off-putting crocs pairs his plaid shirt with plaid shorts.
It is almost too hard to continue...that's what she said. Forgive me if it seems odd that I keep making those jokes, but I can't pass up a good "that's what she said" in life or in writing so you'll just have to deal with it.
I have variety in my plaid, usually pertaining around a base color. Plaid works well in that it provides accents to an otherwise boring button up shirt. Yet I find that these offenders often find the worst plaids possible. They find the kind of plaid that has no distinct direction, no base color, and seems to have too many ideas going on at the same time. It's like Rihanna.
It would actually be OK if they just kept it to the shirt or the shorts and paired it with something a little more....I don't know, fashion forward? What they do instead is a disgusting act of mutiny that I don't think anyone should stand for. They pair their ugly shirt with a pair of shorts that are just close enough to the same pattern to ALMOST be a plaid short suit....but they aren't quite there.
I saw several of these offenders in one week and thought I was going to loose my eye-sight when something all together odd happened. I saw an elderly man not only wearing plaid with plaid, but he had giant spectacles and a bow-tie to boot! The only thing I could think about him was, "HOW CUTE IS THAT LITTLE OLD MAN?"
That's when it all made sense. Old people get to wear whatever they want. Well. Old people and Lady Gaga.
You see, like the Lady Gaga, old people can strut around in literally their naked birth suit and people will only applaud their decision. I've seen men wear pants up to their chins, women wear giant purple moo moos with ice cream stains from three weeks ago, and a couple wearing matching gold lamay track outfits. I have never thought to myself, "OOF! What is that old person wearing?". I only find it endearing when I see a 70 year old grandmother walking down the street with bright yellow dyed hair.
Why they have this ability, I'm not sure. But I'll tell you one thing.
I'm jealous.
LOVES AND STRUGGS
B DANN
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Dear Bed - or - Why I am a ManCave Kind of a Guy
Get out of my room.
No really. GET OUT!
For those that have known me for a long time, I am particular about my space. If I invite someone over, and yes I am talking about a special friend, than they will very rarely see my room upon first visit. I will say, over the years, I've gotten better about giving ample prep time for my room so that said visitors wont think I'm weird when I refute them entry. That being said, this has been a long uphill battle for me.
I can remember being around ten years old, already divalicious, and not letting anyone into my room. This included my family members. I think a majority of the reason, at least when I was first starting to be super crazy about the whole room thing, was due to the fact that I'm not the cleanest person. There was something about the mess that I would create that I needed to maintain, something to do with my identity or some bull shit. I think that was another reason I had a hard time letting people in my room. The bedroom says so much about a person, to the point where people literally put the very fabric of what makes them unique onto their walls. Whether that means putting up photos from Amber's birthday party where you were listening to Sugar Ray for hours and now you can't fathom your own existence, or perhaps the bowling trophy you got a ten because you were a prodigy who picked a different path but still want the reminder.....I digress. Amber was a bitch anyways.
To be frank...not amber's gay boyfriend, the act of being frank..oh whatever, I've never been one to put things up on my walls. That doesn't mean I don't put things on my walls, but its never felt very genuine for me to do that. I just moved into my new apartment in Astoria not too long ago, and this is the first time I've ever even painted! I kind of like having the bare walls, but I also know that I'm a little embarrassed by it. Between that and the messy thing, I'm pretty sure that is the reasoning behind me being so "You shall not pass!!!" about the whole thing.
I have learned though, especially in the past year, that I NEED that kind of space.
Back in May, I had a living situation that was...well....a little abnormal. I don't want you all to think this is gay or anything, but I had someone else sleeping in my room. FOOLED YOU!!!
Well only slightly. You see, I had come up with the idea that I wanted to move to the city to become one of those big Broadway stars that you hear about in the talking pictures. A good friend of my, and perhaps the timing was ironically perfect, had just ended a pretty serious relationship and needed to move out of the place he was staying at. My crazy brain thought, "WELL THIS IS JUST PERFECT TIMING!!!"
What I had decided to do was let him move in early, taking over my lease, and I would sleep out in the living room until I could figure something else out. Womp womp, what a great idea :(
It was at this time that I realized, to my own chagrin, that I needed to have personal space. I was living out of a suitcase IN MY OWN HOUSE. A slight side note, I apologize for all of the capitol letters. I'm not sure if this is a temporary style choice or if my writing has just evolved....mmmmm...pokemon...DONT JUDGE!
But like,4 srsly guys, I was homeless in my own home. It was about as sad as a bear wearing a business suit after he's just been laid off from his gig as Smokey. Think about it....go on, I know it's sad but really, it's a great metaphor/image/REALITY!?
I thought that this phase would end, but to my now continuous chagrin, this phase would persist for several months. Once I left the town of beans, or for those ruffians who don't know any better, BAHSTON, I went back to Newyorkachusetts* for a brief encounter. *-Newyorkachusetts is Connecticut, but honestly, if you didn't know that it means you haven't been reading my blog and I am now disgusted by your presence. If you did understand the reference, I thank you with a simple smile :)....or a pirate smile if you prefer Pp
Whilst at my homeward bound abode (I LOVE THAT MOVIE!!! MJ FOX 4EVR!!!) I also did not have a place to call my own. You see, my mother was able to move on from the whole empty nest thing very easily, and made my old room into her costume closet. In retrospect, I can see how that statement seems odd. All of you now think that my mother plays live action role playing games and is a level 12 dungeon master. In fact, she is a level 12. A level 12 costume designer though. I'm the dungeon master.
Judge away.
From here, I ventured to good old Inwood, which I am convinced is the only place that is on the island of Manhattan that no one has ever heard of beyond the people that live there. I compare it to the Wizard of Oz...but Dominican.
I was extremely fortunate to have a good friend of mine let me sleep in her apartment while I found a place of my own. This was what I mark as the beginning of my bed struggles. Even though I hadn't slept in a real bed in months at this point, she had me sleeping on her air mattress. Before this, I had been sleeping on couches and barrels of "HAI GURL", so I was really looking forward to sleeping in something comparable to a bed.
More chagrin.
So some how, I had ruined life and god was upset at me....probably the whole gay thing started it...anyways...to the point where I had broken the air mattress. Don't get me wrong, it blew up just fine (that's what she said HAHAHAHAHAHAHA???) but I would wake up every morning in a cocoon of sadness and despair.
After what seemed liked...well a really long time, at my friends house I finally found the perfect apartment (COMMENCE JEALOUS RANGE!). There was a problem though. I still had no bed.
Back tracking to when I was in Boston, some of you may be paying attention to the fact that I never took the bed away from the apartment. Well the bed was struggly and it kept poking me in the back. I'm still convinced the mattress was sentient and was slowly making me into a vampire cyborg. UGH, the human part of the cyborg would be the vampire, still making two halves to a whole! It OBVIOUSLY couldn't be human, vampire AND robot all at the same time....or could it?
Well struggles ensued in Astoria because I had yet another air mattress that deflated every night. Whatever higher being is in charge of the air mattress, please cut me a break. Every morning I would wake up, hoping to come out of the cocoon looking like Channing Tatum, or Paula Dean but that is a whole other story.
FINALLY, after months of bed struggles....again, judge away....I have finally gotten a real bed.
Now that I've ranted at you for what seems to be the better part of ten minutes that you'll now never get back, what was the point you ask? Well, I've learned two things about what I need and the fundamentals of a room. First and foremost, I need my own space. In the time that I was staying all over everyone else's shit, it made me confirm the fact that people need alone time, and I am NO exception. I felt trapped and abused by my own surroundings, so said Elizabeth Berkeley THANK YOU SHOWGIRLS AND JESSE SPANA!, to the point where I wasn't even Brian anymore. Sad business bears to that as well. In that time, I've also learned something else. Whatever I have as my own doesn't need to be a bedroom, but it does need to be a ManCave. Like the theory on squares, a ManCave can be a bedroom but a bedroom is not always a ManCave. I don't know if that analogy directly transfers but it feels right so I'll let it stay....that's what she said.
Here are some things that my ManCave will require (hint hint to my future sugar daddy who happens to be Brazilian and loaded with cash and love...)
-Privacy which may involve biometric entry of some kind. Fingerprints though because I've seen too many sci-fi shows where someone gets there eye stolen so they can enter a room. I'd much rather loose the hand thank you very much.
-Technology. Expensive technology. Expensive and pretty technology.
-A masseuse. If said Brazilian sugar daddy happens to also be this than added points!
-Bar service. I need my lawyers handy at all times....did you like the pun I made? No but seriously, someone better be able to make me LITs and adjust my taxes!
-Did I mention expensive and pretty technology?
-If the ManCave is indeed a bedroom, than I will also need a comfy bed.....and another ManCave.
I think the most important thing I've learned in general is, at least for me, what makes my room mine is the bed. If I don't have a good bed than a wake up looking like Jay Leno, and NO ONE WANTS THAT!
LOVES AND STRUGGS
B DANN
No really. GET OUT!
For those that have known me for a long time, I am particular about my space. If I invite someone over, and yes I am talking about a special friend, than they will very rarely see my room upon first visit. I will say, over the years, I've gotten better about giving ample prep time for my room so that said visitors wont think I'm weird when I refute them entry. That being said, this has been a long uphill battle for me.
I can remember being around ten years old, already divalicious, and not letting anyone into my room. This included my family members. I think a majority of the reason, at least when I was first starting to be super crazy about the whole room thing, was due to the fact that I'm not the cleanest person. There was something about the mess that I would create that I needed to maintain, something to do with my identity or some bull shit. I think that was another reason I had a hard time letting people in my room. The bedroom says so much about a person, to the point where people literally put the very fabric of what makes them unique onto their walls. Whether that means putting up photos from Amber's birthday party where you were listening to Sugar Ray for hours and now you can't fathom your own existence, or perhaps the bowling trophy you got a ten because you were a prodigy who picked a different path but still want the reminder.....I digress. Amber was a bitch anyways.
To be frank...not amber's gay boyfriend, the act of being frank..oh whatever, I've never been one to put things up on my walls. That doesn't mean I don't put things on my walls, but its never felt very genuine for me to do that. I just moved into my new apartment in Astoria not too long ago, and this is the first time I've ever even painted! I kind of like having the bare walls, but I also know that I'm a little embarrassed by it. Between that and the messy thing, I'm pretty sure that is the reasoning behind me being so "You shall not pass!!!" about the whole thing.
I have learned though, especially in the past year, that I NEED that kind of space.
Back in May, I had a living situation that was...well....a little abnormal. I don't want you all to think this is gay or anything, but I had someone else sleeping in my room. FOOLED YOU!!!
Well only slightly. You see, I had come up with the idea that I wanted to move to the city to become one of those big Broadway stars that you hear about in the talking pictures. A good friend of my, and perhaps the timing was ironically perfect, had just ended a pretty serious relationship and needed to move out of the place he was staying at. My crazy brain thought, "WELL THIS IS JUST PERFECT TIMING!!!"
What I had decided to do was let him move in early, taking over my lease, and I would sleep out in the living room until I could figure something else out. Womp womp, what a great idea :(
It was at this time that I realized, to my own chagrin, that I needed to have personal space. I was living out of a suitcase IN MY OWN HOUSE. A slight side note, I apologize for all of the capitol letters. I'm not sure if this is a temporary style choice or if my writing has just evolved....mmmmm...pokemon...DONT JUDGE!
But like,4 srsly guys, I was homeless in my own home. It was about as sad as a bear wearing a business suit after he's just been laid off from his gig as Smokey. Think about it....go on, I know it's sad but really, it's a great metaphor/image/REALITY!?
I thought that this phase would end, but to my now continuous chagrin, this phase would persist for several months. Once I left the town of beans, or for those ruffians who don't know any better, BAHSTON, I went back to Newyorkachusetts* for a brief encounter. *-Newyorkachusetts is Connecticut, but honestly, if you didn't know that it means you haven't been reading my blog and I am now disgusted by your presence. If you did understand the reference, I thank you with a simple smile :)....or a pirate smile if you prefer Pp
Whilst at my homeward bound abode (I LOVE THAT MOVIE!!! MJ FOX 4EVR!!!) I also did not have a place to call my own. You see, my mother was able to move on from the whole empty nest thing very easily, and made my old room into her costume closet. In retrospect, I can see how that statement seems odd. All of you now think that my mother plays live action role playing games and is a level 12 dungeon master. In fact, she is a level 12. A level 12 costume designer though. I'm the dungeon master.
Judge away.
From here, I ventured to good old Inwood, which I am convinced is the only place that is on the island of Manhattan that no one has ever heard of beyond the people that live there. I compare it to the Wizard of Oz...but Dominican.
I was extremely fortunate to have a good friend of mine let me sleep in her apartment while I found a place of my own. This was what I mark as the beginning of my bed struggles. Even though I hadn't slept in a real bed in months at this point, she had me sleeping on her air mattress. Before this, I had been sleeping on couches and barrels of "HAI GURL", so I was really looking forward to sleeping in something comparable to a bed.
More chagrin.
So some how, I had ruined life and god was upset at me....probably the whole gay thing started it...anyways...to the point where I had broken the air mattress. Don't get me wrong, it blew up just fine (that's what she said HAHAHAHAHAHAHA???) but I would wake up every morning in a cocoon of sadness and despair.
After what seemed liked...well a really long time, at my friends house I finally found the perfect apartment (COMMENCE JEALOUS RANGE!). There was a problem though. I still had no bed.
Back tracking to when I was in Boston, some of you may be paying attention to the fact that I never took the bed away from the apartment. Well the bed was struggly and it kept poking me in the back. I'm still convinced the mattress was sentient and was slowly making me into a vampire cyborg. UGH, the human part of the cyborg would be the vampire, still making two halves to a whole! It OBVIOUSLY couldn't be human, vampire AND robot all at the same time....or could it?
Well struggles ensued in Astoria because I had yet another air mattress that deflated every night. Whatever higher being is in charge of the air mattress, please cut me a break. Every morning I would wake up, hoping to come out of the cocoon looking like Channing Tatum, or Paula Dean but that is a whole other story.
FINALLY, after months of bed struggles....again, judge away....I have finally gotten a real bed.
Now that I've ranted at you for what seems to be the better part of ten minutes that you'll now never get back, what was the point you ask? Well, I've learned two things about what I need and the fundamentals of a room. First and foremost, I need my own space. In the time that I was staying all over everyone else's shit, it made me confirm the fact that people need alone time, and I am NO exception. I felt trapped and abused by my own surroundings, so said Elizabeth Berkeley THANK YOU SHOWGIRLS AND JESSE SPANA!, to the point where I wasn't even Brian anymore. Sad business bears to that as well. In that time, I've also learned something else. Whatever I have as my own doesn't need to be a bedroom, but it does need to be a ManCave. Like the theory on squares, a ManCave can be a bedroom but a bedroom is not always a ManCave. I don't know if that analogy directly transfers but it feels right so I'll let it stay....that's what she said.
Here are some things that my ManCave will require (hint hint to my future sugar daddy who happens to be Brazilian and loaded with cash and love...)
-Privacy which may involve biometric entry of some kind. Fingerprints though because I've seen too many sci-fi shows where someone gets there eye stolen so they can enter a room. I'd much rather loose the hand thank you very much.
-Technology. Expensive technology. Expensive and pretty technology.
-A masseuse. If said Brazilian sugar daddy happens to also be this than added points!
-Bar service. I need my lawyers handy at all times....did you like the pun I made? No but seriously, someone better be able to make me LITs and adjust my taxes!
-Did I mention expensive and pretty technology?
-If the ManCave is indeed a bedroom, than I will also need a comfy bed.....and another ManCave.
I think the most important thing I've learned in general is, at least for me, what makes my room mine is the bed. If I don't have a good bed than a wake up looking like Jay Leno, and NO ONE WANTS THAT!
LOVES AND STRUGGS
B DANN
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Dear Bravo by Andy or Why We Give a Damn About First World Problems
Andy Cohen and the entire creative team over at Bravo have discovered something marvelous. Almost as marvelous as that giant cat cave in Aladdin or Bette Midler in Hocus Pocus.
They have figured out how to make us care, I mean really care, about first world problems.
Before I go further, I will admit that this essay is part of my campaign to get a job with Bravo, so expect some shmoozery on my part. However, this does not mean you are allowed to stop reading if you aren't a part of the Bravo staff.
For those of you that have been following my entries, you know my personal opinion on the crisis that is the FWP. Recently, I was thinking about a particular person with severe FWP while watching some hilarious clips from this stellar season of the "Real Housewives of New Jersey". This paradox evaded me until I realized I was perpetuating the very thing that I had set out to destroy. Somehow, I had been made to care about these first world problems that, if presented to me in the real world, I would normally look at in disdain as opposed to excitement.
But why? Let's look at the facts.
Bravo first reinvented the wheel with their mega hit "Project Runway". This show blew through the roof with it's ratings and viewership because it had done something that few reality shows had done before. Instead of it being a reality based competition where the grand prize is a lump some of money, it was a show with a main goal in mind for the winner. Everyone competing had all the same desired goal and tons of experience to make for a really interesting, and might I add deserving, competition. Shows before it, like "Survivor", had no common thread between the contestants like those on "Project Runway"......set aside the fact the offensiveness of "surviving" in a place that other people were currently living in. Talk about first world problems. Let's give you a million dollars for lasting a month in a place where people have been doing it for free for centuries....
"Project Runway" found a golden opportunity by creating a show with real purpose that wasn't centered around greed. It was an occupationally based reality competition. I think the reason why people care about this more is that it's easier to empathize with someone that works themselves to the bone for a purpose rather than those that get lucky enough to spend a month on a luxurious island to win a million dollars.
It was also one of the first reality based competitions to openly acknowledge having gay contestants. I've always said that once the gays are on board with something, you can guarantee a hit. I think "Glee" is case and point on that.
Bravo has gone on to have many other shows with this same thread, including the EMMY award winning "Top Chef", "Sheer Genius", and "Work of Art".
Yet this only explains half of Bravo's success. The competition based shows, though popular, are not the only brand of reality by Bravo. Following in this idea of occupation, Bravo came out with another type of show starting with "Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D List". There are a lot of reasons why this show is so great, and many of them stem from the fact that it's a show about Kathy Griffin. But it was also Bravo's fist venture into having a show about a specific type of person. They didn't have a random assortment of people who had nothing in common, nor was it a show about someone just because they were famous. In fact, especially in it's first season, this show was the antithesis of that celebrity concept. It was about this really great, might I add gay-friendly, comedian who would literally do anything to get higher on the celebrity totem pole.
Bravo came out with similar shows like "Work Out", "Blow Out", and "Flipping Out".....is there a coming out theme here?....that centered around engaging people within specific and luxurious occupations. Again, everything was immediately accessible to the gay community as far as what we could relate to, and they had found people with purpose. Even though these people would complain about First World Problems, like having a house maid that didn't fold your sheets right, we were engaged because of the people they had chosen.
Bravo landed big time with it's Housewives series, and not necessarily for a different set of reasons. Of all the reality celebs that have come from Bravo TV, few compare to the wives on these shows. Names like Bethenny Frankel and Teresa Guidice are household items, and these women in particular have even created their own brands. I keep asking myself, why do I care about these ridiculous women who seem to have so many problems yet they have more money than I would know what to do with.
Because they are Fabulous. That's right, they deserve the capitol F.
House-wifery, in my opinion, is one of the most easily relatable occupations there is. Bravo already had the gays with these shows by adding the likes of Kelly Bensimon and Danielle Staub, but they had gained something even more important. Real Housewives.
Think about it. Woman that stay at home do things for their family all day. Though they aren't holding million dollar weddings in New York hotels or shopping their children around for commercial spots, they do understand the underlying value of putting the family first. Being a mother can be a thankless job, and often involves putting up with your families bull-shit. LOVE YOU MOMMY! This series of show does so well because it allows REAL housewives to commiserate with the show wives and escape at the same time.
I think Bravo will only continue to have success with this smash series. I'm personally really looking forward to the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills which is going to have Kelsey Grammars EX!
I don't know if it makes me happy to care about people with morbid amounts of first world problems, but I'll tell you what does make me happy.
Watching Teresa flip a table or the Countess' release party for her new single. The only thing I have to say to Bravo is....bravo.
...and can I have a job? I may or may not have applied for your Research Coordinator position.....as in I did. And please don't mind the odd grammar structure. It's part of my style.
LOVE AND STRUGGS
B DANN
They have figured out how to make us care, I mean really care, about first world problems.
Before I go further, I will admit that this essay is part of my campaign to get a job with Bravo, so expect some shmoozery on my part. However, this does not mean you are allowed to stop reading if you aren't a part of the Bravo staff.
For those of you that have been following my entries, you know my personal opinion on the crisis that is the FWP. Recently, I was thinking about a particular person with severe FWP while watching some hilarious clips from this stellar season of the "Real Housewives of New Jersey". This paradox evaded me until I realized I was perpetuating the very thing that I had set out to destroy. Somehow, I had been made to care about these first world problems that, if presented to me in the real world, I would normally look at in disdain as opposed to excitement.
But why? Let's look at the facts.
Bravo first reinvented the wheel with their mega hit "Project Runway". This show blew through the roof with it's ratings and viewership because it had done something that few reality shows had done before. Instead of it being a reality based competition where the grand prize is a lump some of money, it was a show with a main goal in mind for the winner. Everyone competing had all the same desired goal and tons of experience to make for a really interesting, and might I add deserving, competition. Shows before it, like "Survivor", had no common thread between the contestants like those on "Project Runway"......set aside the fact the offensiveness of "surviving" in a place that other people were currently living in. Talk about first world problems. Let's give you a million dollars for lasting a month in a place where people have been doing it for free for centuries....
"Project Runway" found a golden opportunity by creating a show with real purpose that wasn't centered around greed. It was an occupationally based reality competition. I think the reason why people care about this more is that it's easier to empathize with someone that works themselves to the bone for a purpose rather than those that get lucky enough to spend a month on a luxurious island to win a million dollars.
It was also one of the first reality based competitions to openly acknowledge having gay contestants. I've always said that once the gays are on board with something, you can guarantee a hit. I think "Glee" is case and point on that.
Bravo has gone on to have many other shows with this same thread, including the EMMY award winning "Top Chef", "Sheer Genius", and "Work of Art".
Yet this only explains half of Bravo's success. The competition based shows, though popular, are not the only brand of reality by Bravo. Following in this idea of occupation, Bravo came out with another type of show starting with "Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D List". There are a lot of reasons why this show is so great, and many of them stem from the fact that it's a show about Kathy Griffin. But it was also Bravo's fist venture into having a show about a specific type of person. They didn't have a random assortment of people who had nothing in common, nor was it a show about someone just because they were famous. In fact, especially in it's first season, this show was the antithesis of that celebrity concept. It was about this really great, might I add gay-friendly, comedian who would literally do anything to get higher on the celebrity totem pole.
Bravo came out with similar shows like "Work Out", "Blow Out", and "Flipping Out".....is there a coming out theme here?....that centered around engaging people within specific and luxurious occupations. Again, everything was immediately accessible to the gay community as far as what we could relate to, and they had found people with purpose. Even though these people would complain about First World Problems, like having a house maid that didn't fold your sheets right, we were engaged because of the people they had chosen.
Bravo landed big time with it's Housewives series, and not necessarily for a different set of reasons. Of all the reality celebs that have come from Bravo TV, few compare to the wives on these shows. Names like Bethenny Frankel and Teresa Guidice are household items, and these women in particular have even created their own brands. I keep asking myself, why do I care about these ridiculous women who seem to have so many problems yet they have more money than I would know what to do with.
Because they are Fabulous. That's right, they deserve the capitol F.
House-wifery, in my opinion, is one of the most easily relatable occupations there is. Bravo already had the gays with these shows by adding the likes of Kelly Bensimon and Danielle Staub, but they had gained something even more important. Real Housewives.
Think about it. Woman that stay at home do things for their family all day. Though they aren't holding million dollar weddings in New York hotels or shopping their children around for commercial spots, they do understand the underlying value of putting the family first. Being a mother can be a thankless job, and often involves putting up with your families bull-shit. LOVE YOU MOMMY! This series of show does so well because it allows REAL housewives to commiserate with the show wives and escape at the same time.
I think Bravo will only continue to have success with this smash series. I'm personally really looking forward to the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills which is going to have Kelsey Grammars EX!
I don't know if it makes me happy to care about people with morbid amounts of first world problems, but I'll tell you what does make me happy.
Watching Teresa flip a table or the Countess' release party for her new single. The only thing I have to say to Bravo is....bravo.
...and can I have a job? I may or may not have applied for your Research Coordinator position.....as in I did. And please don't mind the odd grammar structure. It's part of my style.
LOVE AND STRUGGS
B DANN
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